I Can't Believe this

Okay,better for me to delete all feelings,delete my last post in this blog. i just try to open up everything that make me sick for this last fuckin year.. but i thought that wasn't a good idea. 

I feelt sooooo damn disappointed with this guy,Omg i can't even trust he said that to me last night!!!!

and this is the only reason i deleted my last post.

He never treated me badly,he never ever do that to me before.. but in reality,he did :)

yaah he knew everything about this girl,i told him when we're like eum damn together.. he said she never will hurt me and she probably never hurted me? oh God,can't you relize every single word you've said to me? huh?

cried aloooouuuuuddd as i can,but maybe that was my last tears for him.

I'm really really really hate him now, i hate him soooo fuckinnnn bad . thanks .

beneran gak ada kerjaan dan selalu try something strange :p kadang pake pake jilbab sendiri trus fotttooo deeh hihi ,emm lumayan laah jadi Gabriella Tajima *JLEEBB*

Pieces..

YEAH i'ts TRUE !!!

This is the song when i feel so useless.

I tried to be perfect..But nothing was worth it..
I don't believe it makes me real..
I thought it'd be easy..
But no one believes me,I meant all the things I said.

If you believe it's in my soul I'd say all the words that I know.
Just to see if it would show..
That I'm trying to let you know "That I'm better off on my own"

This place is so empty,my thoughts are so tempting.
I don't know how it got so bad:(
Sometimes it's so crazy .. that nothing can save me.
But it's the only thing that I have..

...............................................................................

I tried to be perfect,It just wasn't worth it..
Nothing could ever be so wrong,It's hard to believe me..
It never gets easy..I guess I knew that all along..

SUM 41 - PIECES

???????????

Satu persatu pemilik bumi ini mengambil mahluk-mahluk yang aku kasihi..
Membawanya jauh,terbang,melayang,tertiup angin.. dan lenyap tanpa arah bagai debu.
Tak ada yang tersisa,hanyalah gumpalan duka..
Perih kesakitan ini tak tertahankan menerjang arah sang waktu..
Pilu luka di hati ini tak sanggup lagi menahan derasnya jutaan semilir angin.


Hanya ingin berharap ,garisan hidup ini memang jalan dan anugerah-Nya..
Tak banyak meminta,namun bersimpuh memohon untuk digantikan..
Gantikan..ganti semua yang telah direnggut Tuhan dengan sesuatu cahaya kehidupan yang lebih berkilau bak permata di lautan butiran emas..
Tidak begitu meminta Tuhan mengganti arti keresahan akan makna dalam sebuah cinta dan kehidupan di hati ini.. Karna ku tau,sayatan demi sayatan pilu yang tak tampak di hati ini tak kan bisa tergantikan..


Gabriella,14 Februari 2012

Loving You..

Secercah harapan yang menjunjung tinggi arti menanti..
Segumpal keinginan untuk mencintai tanpa dikasihi..
Ketika semua berubah menjadi kian bermakna tapi hampa,aku mencoba meniti langkahku untuk mengagungkan arti namamu,Cinta..
Aku ingin mencintaimu dengan sederhana... seperti kata yang tak sempat diucapkan kayu kepada api yang menjadikannya abu... Aku ingin mencintaimu dengan sederhana... seperti isyarat yang tak sempat dikirimkan awan kepada hujan yang menjadikannya tiada..
:))

I'm Lost.

i'm scared,i'm lost with no direction.
no one will save me even just for once.
i can't find the brightness in my life.
i can't find any stars in my long..long night.
i just can find fear,terrified,scared,darkness.. these thing completely exist in my life now.

if i can ask God for one question,i will ask "Why do you keep me live? Why"
i mean yeah,you know .. today was so hard,running and cried in school toilet, crying just for almost one hour? do i must do that thing everyday????
I can't do this anymore,God..
I want quit:(